Today I had to turn down 360€ worth of work, in exchange for 96€.
Ouch, that wasn’t easy.
This isn’t the first time I have turned down money in exchange for freedom, flexibility and opportunity. Before I came to Spain I had a $75,000 job offered I walked away from. This summer I turned down 500€/month of steady work because it didn’t feel quite right. Today was just another part to the saga, of saying no to money and yes to the bigger picture.
I had to decide:
1) Can I live off less money to allow for the opportunity to chase what I’m really going after?
2) Do I let my immediate concerns about money and bills take over my mindset?
First, I calculated my bills and my current income.
Job #1 – one day/week, and has flexibility of which day = 96€/month
Job #2 – two days per week, and no flexibility = 360€/month.
Neither job offer much growth opportunity. These jobs would just help me pay my bills.
I’ve already cut my budget down to the barest its ever been. I have completely tapped out my savings. My credit card bills have too many digits and when I’m at the grocery store? Canned tuna and crackers are always on my list.
Even though I have turned down work many times along this journey… it’s freakin hard, you do not get used to it.
Each time I have cut down my schedule to keep it open for the “right work”, the very next day I was out searching again, just to keep the bills paid.
I would turn down one thing, and then another would come up. I’d debate, assess, analyze all over again. It is exhausting.
No wonder I keep waking up in the middle of the night and calculating numbers.
The glory of this dilemma is that its a practice of commitment. When I say no to NOW, and put my faith that something better is coming, my spirits lift up a bit. I feel committed to myself, and the journey. I feel optimistic about what life has waiting for me. I feel committed to making my dreams a reality, no matter how many risks I have to take, difficult decisions I need to make, or cans of tuna in my pantry.
Ironically, each time I do this, something magical happens. Just 30 minutes after I turned down the 360€ job, I checked my email to find a reply I’d been waiting for regarding a contract.
A bit later, I had a promising phone call and request to schedule a paid training before the year’s end.
I’ve realized that sometimes saying no to NOW turns into a really thrilling experience of the present moments.
Have you turned down work in your entrepreneurial journey? What has that experience been like for you?